military makes Flesh-eating, steampunk robots

Posted: July 21, 2009 in Politics, sci-fi, science
Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ,

maars_robot_large It’s real! It’s also one of the coolest things I heard all week. A steam powered, organic bio-mass eating, military robot. It’s steampunk (which is very IN right now), it’s robot (also in) and it can eat humans! (zombies also in) which all add up to make it the coolest robot around. ( I know technically it’s not a zombie, because how can a machine be un-dead, but still. It can EAT people!)

The EATR (Energetically Autonomous Tactical Robot) will be an autonomous robotic platform that forages for fuel by ingesting bio-mass, be it grass, wood, or dead soldiers on the battlefield. Put a laser, a tactical shotgun, and a self-aware military computer network on that bad boy and we got our first generation of Terminators. Whah hoo!

Update: Alright, I can see this is going to be a popular post so maybe I should do some actual homework and make it good. The EATR was design by Robotic Technology Inc. (future site of mainframe computer that enslaves humanity). It uses an award winning Cyclone engine to create power by burning biomass and using the steam to power pistons to convert that energy into electricity to charge its batteries. A complete overview is available here.

In order to assuage public concern, the CEO of Cyclone had this to say:

“We completely understand the public’s concern about futuristic robots feeding on the human population, but that is not our mission,” stated Harry Schoell, Cyclone’s CEO. “We are focused on demonstrating that our engines can create usable, green power from plentiful, renewable plant matter. The commercial applications alone for this earth-friendly energy solution are enormous.”

Righhhhht. “Green Power” Well you know what Soilent Green was? Huh? Do ya? It was people!!! Of course the CEO won’t give away their plans for world domination and subjugation of the human species. He may already be a cyborg. Maybe even THE cyborg that will rule us all with a titanium fist.

In all seriousness though, I’m glad that the military is looking at alternatives for fueling their war machine. The artificial intelligence aspect of the EATR looks promising as well. While I can see this working out in the field, I can’t imagine that all of our cars will be powered this way. Then we won’t have any forests left.


  1. exuvia says:

    Thank you, thank you, thank you! I was looking for a solid reference to this creation of… hmmm…

    Ok. This time I will post on the thought and culture behind such a… hmmm…

    See you at my place in a few days.

    Nice to visit again.


  2. alpinmack says:

    Yes, the future is a little scary, huh? I really wonder where we are going with all of this. I just read about the military having to shoot down a Predator drone over Afghanistan because it wasn’t responding to the controls and the fail safes had (get this) failed. Hmmm.

  3. exuvia says:

    What might have motivated humans to invent this little monster?

    That is what is scary… not just the invention itself but the human mind(s) behind it.

    They get to solidify their dark matter, not gray, dark, in technology. The wonderful ability to think twisted into serving Death.

    “So I gave them up unto their own hearts’ lust: and they walked in their own counsels”

    Ideology is of no importance before desolation.

  4. […] military makes Flesh-eating, steampunk robots July 2009 3 comments […]

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